UnChristlike?

An incident occurred where a Christian friend of mine borrowed a rather large sum of money from me. We live in the same apartment and so have shared a lot of things through more than a decade of living together. I don't mind lending money at all when I have some. I have been blessed with a rather well-paying job. I'm often busy but I do think I am paid enough to live comfortably, thanks be to God.

However, just recently this friend of mine wanted to attend a conference out of town that would yet again necessitate that she borrow money from me. I was of course agreeable to this, albeit quite jealous that she is able to go to such a conference while I have to work my way through the Lenten season. But that's okay though because I do have a child to take care of and with whom I also want to spend some quality time with (as well as my family too).

As it was time for this friend of mine to leave for her conference, it was her turn to shop for groceries. She did not do this before she left and neither did she tell anyone. By the time she had left, it was very difficult for us left behind to purchase food or groceries because it was now the Lenten holidays and most if not all the shops were closed.

I feel bad about this I really do. I feel quite betrayed and taken advantaged of. I think she should have at least told us that this was the case. I feel even worse because I took the extra effort to get her that money in time for her conference, but she did not extend to us the same courtesy and I don't think that's very nice. I'm no longer as angry as I was last week. I feel that my anger will accomplish nothing. But I still feel bad about it. I wonder if I'm wrong to feel this way but for some reason I don't think so. God help me decide what to feel

Frustrations And God's Sustenance

I was unable to post last Sunday's message from church on time because I was swamped with work over the week. I've worked 12 hours per day the last 5 days and I am exhausted.

I'm also frustrated because some of my relationships are a little off and I can't seem to help feeling sad and angry at myself.

Last Sunday, the speaker mentioned about the mountains and valleys of life, relating these to the promise land God was to give the Israelites when they left Egypt. In contrast to Egypt where they sow their food - Canaan was going to prove a great change in pace and ambiance.

The speaker likened Egypt to the world where there is a steady source of resource. There is the Nile river that would seemingly sustain us. However we'd be slaves in this land of Egypt. Slaves to our sinful desires and slaves to the world that commands us to sow and plant and reap/ harvest.

Canaan on the other hand, was a land of mountains and valleys that drank water from the rain falling from heaven. Being in the promised land means we will have to entrust our resources to God who will provide the rain in due time.

Applies well to me this week. I admit I prayed a lot for God to guide me through meeting after meeting and analysis after analysis, because believe me I can't do it on my own. I'm just about ready to fall over right now from exhaustion and frustration but still I think I am blessed because I could have never survived the week without God's sustenance.

The Hand Of God

The message in church today revolved around a woman named Fanny Crosby. She was a hymn writer and a poetess. What few people know though was that she was blind. Just 6 weeks after she was born she lost her eye sight, due to "questionable medical practice" at the time. But still she grew up to serve the Lord.

In her life though, she manifested a cheerfulness that was considered a great achievement even after 3 dreadful tragedies in her life: first was her blindness, which she compensated by memorizing multiple sections of the bible (even more than people who can see these days); second was her less than ideal marriage to a fellow musician, and third was the death of her child.

Those truly have to be devastating things. However she held steadfast to the love of the Lord and she continued on to speak and write hymns and teach for the greater glory of God.

The message in church today was more about how the hand of God (the same hand of God) that guided and shielded her, although we do not undergo the same circumstances, is the same hand that guides and protects us. The speaker's emphasis as well was not the we look at other people and their experiences because people have different experiences. Although one person is healed shortly after prayer and another is not (even if they both prayed), still we have to move forward with the will of the Lord and follow through by obeying Him.

We should set our eyes on the Lord and not on others. It will serve no good purpose to compare ourselves to other people. I know I've tried and nothing good has come of it. So I agree with the speaker, let us set our eyes on the Lord. He will follow through on his promises, provide His had to guide and hide us.

Being At Peace

In this Sunday's message, the topic was peace. It is very relevant to what's happening these days when there are so many troubling times for people. Where do we find peace? It has been said that the peace is not the absence of war, but the presence of God.

This was greatly manifested by one painting that the speaker cited today about a family of birds in their nest on a tree while there was a this horrible storm around them. It's true that we can't avoid the trials and tribulations of life, but what God is trying to say I guess is that even in the midst of these storms, He is there for us. And if we find peace WITH God then we can gain from the peace OF God.

Humility In Abundance

I learned something really nice last Sunday. The speaker quoted the verse Philippian 4:12

"I know indeed how to live in humble circumstances; I know also how to live with abundance. In every circumstance and in all things I have learned the secret of being well fed and of going hungry, of living in abundance and of being in need."

God has given us so many things. We are so blessed. So we must be humble. God allows us to be self-sufficient as a blessing. But we should trust in Him for all things. When I say trust though, doesn't mean we shouldn't do anything. We should still act accordingly and do our jobs and stuff like that, we just should be boastful about them and think it's because we're amazing as people. If anything, we are nothing and only vessels of God. I do hope He leads me in the path He wants me to be.

Passion For The Lord

The message I heard in church today revolved mainly around David and how he had fought so hard to gather the things needed to build the temple of God. The pastor spoke of his earnest desire to build the house of the Lord. However in the end, God said He didn't want David to build his temple, but his son instead.

The pastor spoke of how this didn't dishearten David, like how most of us would probably feel. But he was a humble man and even said that he would rather be a doorman in the house of the Lord than dwell in the tents of the wicked (not sure if that's how it's supposed to go)

The pastor encouraged us to have as much passion as David and seek after the Lord just as he did. I pray for that kind of passion as well.

(image from Crystalinks.com)

Wrong Creed Breeds Wrong Character

The message from church today was pretty enlightening. The speaker was a Singaporean missionary who was assigned in UK and London. Didn't catch his name though but his message was very insightful.

He said that sometimes we think since we go to church often or pray a lot, we know God but actually our perception of God may be wrong. And he's actually right.

One of his examples was that many times people think that just because God is "love" doesn't mean he'll just give us our heart's desire and pamper us all the time. More often than not we prefer to see God like that instead of being the kind of God He really is which is also a God who disciplines us. We'd like to perceive God just as a messiah and savior and discount the fact that He is supposed to be Lord of our lives as well. This then leads us to turn away from the Lord when things get difficult because we are unable to accept that a God who's supposed to be the definition of "love" can do such a thing to us.

The key phrase I got from this is that the wrong perception leads to the wrong reaction which becomes part and parcel of a messed up relationship. This applies to a lot of other relationships as well - our relationships with other people, not just God. However this is most significant when we think about our relationship with God because it is the very foundation of how we deal with other people in our lives.

I'm grateful to the Lord, He sent that guy to speak in our church

(image from Angeltalk.com)